It occurred to me a few days ago that I’ve driven away most of my friends and I can tell you now, that’s not a good feeling.
Over the years, I’ve had a lot of friends, from school to high school, from college and university to different jobs. I can tell you now that I am only friends with one of the people I knew in primary/junior school. From high school, I’m friends with about 3 people still and even then we don’t talk as much as we used to.
When I went to college I met a whole loaf of new people and while I’m friends with some of them still we don’t talk or see each other as much as we used to. Then when I moved away to university I met so many amazing people, the kind of people that you just know you’ll know for the rest of your lives… and I messed up.
I entered what would be the darkest time of my life, I took so much for granted and took a lot of wrong turns, a lot of which I regret now. I pushed everyone away, I entered my own bubble and now there’s only me.
The people I thought would be my friends through life now do everything without me. They all stayed connected from different parts of the country, they all enjoy things together. I know it’s not their fault and I’m trying to reconnect, I’m trying to improve my friendships and I’m trying to fix it.
I’m trying to better myself.